Post by theoc71 on Mar 14, 2011 13:11:34 GMT -8
EMW Wired
Thursday March 6th, 2008
Nassau Memorial Coliseum
Uniondale, New York
From the back, Tommy Vercetti arrives to the arena with a baseball bat in hand and a pissed off look on his face as he makes a b-line to the ring. Fredrick James Francis said, “Tommy Vercetti has not been in a good mood all week since he was screwed out of his EMW Universal Championship first round match last week thanks to Terrell Owens.
Vercetti then makes his way to the ring. No music, no pyro but all business. Vercetti said, “You know it doesn’t take much to piss me off. But there’s one man that since last week have not only pissed me off, but makes me want to rip his head off and feed it to the dogs…That man just happen to be Terrell Owens. So, you wanted to make a huge impact here on Wired by costing me a match in the EMW Universal Championship Tournament. Well, ‘T.O.’, what you did last week, you’ve signed your death warrant and I’m ready to cash in tonight! As a matter of fact…” Vercetti then leaves the ring and gets out a steel chair. Vercetti then re-entered the ring, sets up the chair and sits down. He then continued, “I’m not leaving this ring and I will hold up the whole show all night until Terrell gets his punk ass down here and learns that it is not smart to mess with a psychotic son of a bitch like me!” Vercetti then waits in the ring, sitting down and holding the baseball bat as the show goes to commercial.
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The scheduled “Debut Match” between Carrot Top against Terry Bogard never happened when Carrot Top arrived to the ring but Vercetti’s still sitting in the ring with baseball hat in hand. Carrot Top tells Vercetti to leave the ring so he can have his match but Vercetti is like stone and wouldn’t respond to Carrot Top. Then Terry Bowgard arrived to the ring and asked Vercetti to leave. But Vercetti refuses to respond to either Carrot Top or Terry Bogard. Carrot Top then slaps Vercetti in the face. Then Vercetti got up and hits Carrot Top in the stomach with a baseball bat and did the same with Bogard. Vercetti then unfolds the steel chair and lays it down in the middle of the ring. Vercetti then hits the Vice City Crusher to Carrot Top onto the steel chair. Then he picks up Bogard and did the same thing. Vercetti then grabs the microphone and screams, “COME ON TERRELL…GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE AND GET THE ASS BEATING THAT YOU DESERVE!!!!” Then EMW Wired General Manager Donald Trump arrived on the entrance stage and tells Vercetti that Terrell Owens is not here tonight. However, he said to give Vercetti a pre-recorded message from Texas Stadium in Irving, Texas.
On EMW Vision, Terrell Owens is shown from the Texas Stadium Press Box in Irving, Texas and said, “Well Tommy, if you are seeing this, that means you went on a ‘psychotic rage’ and basically beat up anyone that comes in your way looking for me. Plus, you seem to wonder why I cost you your match last week. Well, it’s pretty simple. In this business, like any business in the world today, you want to take out the biggest dog in the yard…And you just happen to be it, Tommy. It’s nothing personal, really. It’s just the business that I do. But the main reason why I’m not here besides the fact that I don’t want to step anywhere near this sewage infested town of Long Island, New York…But the fact of that I know how to pick my own fights. You want a piece of me; it will be on my time, not yours.” After the video, Vercetti looked on angrily. Trump said, “Now I realized that you are angry but there is one thing that Mr. Owens forgot to know is that, he can’t have any control over the announcement I’m going to make, because at Gold Quest, it will be Tommy Vercetti will take on Terrell Owens one on one. Now I know that you want to take out your frustrations out on someone. So I have made this match for tonight between you and Marsellus Wallace!” Trump then leaves as Vercetti reluctantly leaves the ring and heads to the back.
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The Socialites (Paris Hilton & Kim Kardashain) def. The Simpson Sisters (Jessica Simpson & Ashlee Simpson) via pinfall to become the #1 Contenders for the EMW Women’s Tag Team Championship when Paris Hilton pinned Jessica Simpson after the Hilton Drop. After the match, Ashlee Simpson is arguing with Jessica Simpson and the sisters started blaming each other for the lost. Ashlee and Jessica then leave the ring separately.
In the back, Joy Giovanni interviewed Bud Bundy with Brooke Adams about Bud’s Semi-Final Match of the EMW Universal Championship Tournament. Bud said that for years he had been the butt of every joke made by his family and that he never had his time in the spotlight. Bud then said that’s all going to change starting this week. Bud said that it doesn’t matter if he’s going after the Universal Championship or the United States Championship. Bud said that he’s going to be the best champion in EMW and will prove it tonight and at Gold Quest.
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Bud Bundy with Brooke Adams def. Jack Sparrow in the semi-finals of the EMW Universal Championship Tournament via pinfall after the Bundy Stunner after escaping Sparrow’s attempt of the Pirate’s Plunge. With the win, Bud Bundy will advance to the finals of the EMW Universal Championship Tournament while Jack Sparrow will be apart of a match to determine the first ever EMW United States Champion at Gold Quest.
Christina Aguilera Returns to EMW…Soon!
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In the back, Joy Giovanni interviews Al Bundy about possibly facing his own son in the finals of the EMW Universal Championship Finals. Bundy said, “You know, my son was nothing more than a worthless piece of slime that quite frankly came from my beast of a wife’s side of the family. Also, he’s not the man who was a High School All-American and scored four touchdowns in one game. Truth of the matter is that I’m the better Bundy…Always has…Always will. Now for tonight and my opponent in the semi-finals, The Sandman. Sandman, if you think that you will beat me, then you must have taken way to many hits in the head because tonight, you will have two options, get hit with the Bundy Slam and suffer the three count. Or you can tap out to the Bundy Lock?! The choice is yours!” Bundy then leaves.
Tommy Vercetti def. Marsellus Wallace via disqualification when Terrell Owens came from the crowd and attacked Vercetti from behind. Vercetti then fought back and the two men brawled in the ring until Marsellus Wallace rushed in to attack Vercetti. Vercetti then hits Wallace with the Vice City Crusher but then when he turned around T.O. hits Vercetti with the Playmaker. After that, T.O. plays to the crowd as they booed him loudly as T.O. leaves the ring and admires his handy work.
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Lita, Avril Lavigne & Stripperella def. EMW Vixxxen’s Champion Lindsay Lohan, Kelly Bundy and Bloodrayne via pinfall when Lita pinned Lohan after a moonsault from the top rope.
Human Tornado…Coming Soon to EMW!
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Agent 47 def. McLovin via pinfall after The Code Of Silence.
In the back, Joy Giovanni interviewed The Sandman about his main EMW Universal Championship Tournament Semi-Final Match against Al Bundy. Sandman said, “I don’t need to go into boring ass details on what’s going to happen. Simply, tonight Al Bundy will know why I am the Extreme Icon and I will be the first ever EMW Universal Champion.” Sandman then drinks his beer and then smashes the can on his head and then leaves the area.
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From the ringside broadcast booth, Fredrick James Francis and Ron Burgundy ran down the card so far for EMW Gold Quest:
-- EMW Universal Championship Tournament Final: Bud Bundy vs. Winner of Al Bundy/Sandman
-- EMW United States Championship: Jack Sparrow vs. Loser of Al Bundy/Sandman
-- EMW Vixxxen’s Championship: Lindsay Lohan© vs. Lita
-- EMW Women’s Tag Team Championship: The Vampire Slayers © vs. The Socialites
-- Tommy Vercetti vs. Terrell Owens
-- The Return Of Christina Aguilera
Al Bundy def. The Sandman in the semi-finals of the EMW Universal Championship Tournament via pinfall after the Bundy Slam. After the match, Bud Bundy and Brooke Adams appear on the entrance stage and head to the ring. Once Bud Bundy arrived in the ring, Al and Bud stared down in the middle of the ring as the show ends this week.
“crushcrushcrush” by Paramore from their hit album Riot! Available Now is the official theme song of EMW Wired's Gold Rush!